HOWDY, I'M ROBIN! I FAN OVER MULTIPLE THINGS, EAT LOTS OF YOGURT, AND WRITE ON OCCASION. YOU CAN FIND LINKS TO MY WORK (ALONG WITH MY ASK) BY CLICKING THE TABS OVER YONDER -->
SMURFS ON STEROIDS

justintimerblake:

you know you have hit your lowest point of being low when you start procrastinating your showers

agentcarolinainthemorning:

waluigiology:

i just figured out the perfect murder

kill someone and bury them in their own garden

that way if the police find them they’ll think it was a suicide

#welp looks like the victim committed suicide and promptly buried themselves in their garden #how considerate of them

dreamcatchernovel:

ON A SCALE OF JONAH HILL TO MIC JAGGER, CHANDLER JACOBS IS AN AVERAGE CHICK.

She’s your basic teenager: bored with her provincial life, angry at the world, convinced she’s woefully misunderstood. She has a right to be a little upset, though. Chaos quite literally follows her wherever she goes. She and her mother have lived in six homes in the past eight years, but - after encountering everything from ax-wielding, homicidal maniacs to freak accidents involving vehicles that disappear into thin air - they never seem safe. Until one day, when Ivy Chase blows into town to shed some light on the subject.
Ivy’s got some life-altering news: Chandler can project her nightmares into the real world. Better still: Ivy can teach Chandler to control her abilities.
So you’d think, after a few lessons with Ivy and her brother, Chandler’d be under control and everything’d return to normal, right?
Here’s the catch: Chandler’s not alone.

» C L I C K || T O || S T A R T || R E A D I N G «
dreamcatchernovel:

ON A SCALE OF JONAH HILL TO MIC JAGGER, CHANDLER JACOBS IS AN AVERAGE CHICK.

She’s your basic teenager: bored with her provincial life, angry at the world, convinced she’s woefully misunderstood. She has a right to be a little upset, though. Chaos quite literally follows her wherever she goes. She and her mother have lived in six homes in the past eight years, but - after encountering everything from ax-wielding, homicidal maniacs to freak accidents involving vehicles that disappear into thin air - they never seem safe. Until one day, when Ivy Chase blows into town to shed some light on the subject.
Ivy’s got some life-altering news: Chandler can project her nigthmares into the real world. Better still: Ivy can teach Chandler to control her abilities.
So you’d think, after a few lessons with Ivy and her brother, Chandler’d be under control and everything’d return to normal, right?
Here’s the catch: Chandler’s not alone.

» C L I C K || T O || S T A R T || R E A D I N G «

A Love Like That - Pt. 5

The adventures of domestic!Katandy (and a couple other ships), continued.

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thelightsfwillfade:

I’m not lying or trying to seek attention or whatever.
I just need some motivation and know, well like this seems pathetic, but know someones out there..
“Before you say yes, get him angry. See him scared, see him wanting, see him sick. Stress changes a person. Find out if he drinks and if he does, get him drunk - you’ll learn more about his sober thoughts. Discover his addictions. See if he puts you in front of them. You can’t change people, baby girl. If they are made one way, it doesn’t just wear off. If you hate how he acts when he’s out of it now, you’re going to hate it much worse eight years down the road. You might love him to bits but it doesn’t change that some people just don’t fit.”
-

inkskinned, “My father’s recipe for the man I should marry” (via partygirlmeltdown)

This is one of the most important things I have ever read and I wish I would have come across it sooner. This is real, this is important.

(via thesearentveins)

Seriously. So so seriously.

(via thefrozenrose)

unheroically:

there goes my heart
Read entirely, then outside the brackets, then inside.
“Manticore tails, for those of you who don’t know, release poisonous venom upon injection. Now, if you’re a mortal and you get stung by a manticore, it means certain death. Not a doctor in the world can treat manticore poisoning. However, if you’ve already died and are walking the earth as a reanimated corpse inhabited by a demon that thirsts for nothing but the blood of the innocent, manticore stings only hurt at the injection point and kind of just piss you off.”